Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

For things you would put in a kitty dump.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Roasted By John wrote: Mon May 03, 2021 3:05 pm He's not a kernal, just a grain of dirt by now ;)
I guess there is a kernel of truth to that statement. :o
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
- - -Randy Pausch
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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BMW

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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Life is what happens while you make other plans.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
- - -Randy Pausch
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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That has to be the longest interview of all time!
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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You miss 100% of the shots you don't take - Wayne Gretzky
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Life is what happens while you make other plans.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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DennisD wrote: Tue May 04, 2021 10:51 amimage.png
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
- - -Randy Pausch
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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DennisD wrote: Thu May 06, 2021 8:21 am
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I always wondered why they never covered that aspect of dog ownership....
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Just heard Bill and Melinda Gates are getting a divorce. She gets the house, but Bill insists on keeping the Windows.
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take - Wayne Gretzky
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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And they vote!
Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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DennisD wrote: Fri May 07, 2021 7:58 am image.png

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And they vote!
Took me a second to figure out the 2nd one!
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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DennisD wrote: Fri May 07, 2021 7:58 am
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Maybe he just doesn't want to get bugs in his mouth.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Glenn Schroeder wrote: Fri May 07, 2021 9:19 am Maybe he just doesn't want to get bugs in his mouth.
@Glenn Schroeder,
It seems obvious to me, I don't know why you didn't figure it out...He's wearing that mask so he doesn't scuff up his face if he falls off that motorcycle...
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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..levels of modeling hell
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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mattpeneguy wrote: Fri May 07, 2021 9:29 am image.png

@Glenn Schroeder,
It seems obvious to me, I don't know why you didn't figure it out...He's wearing that mask so he doesn't scuff up his face if he falls off that motorcycle...
..yeah, if only he wore a Immortan Joe face mask? :lol:
"Democracies aren't overthrown; they're given away." -George Lucas
“We only protect what we love, we only love what we understand, and we only understand what we are taught.” - Jacques Cousteau
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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zxys001 wrote: Fri May 07, 2021 12:52 pm ..levels of modeling hell
Paul,
FTFY:
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Git 'er done!
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Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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DennisD wrote: Tue May 11, 2021 2:22 pm Git 'er done!
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Very nice and handy, just keep those embers away from the gas tank ;)
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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SamSpade wrote: Tue May 11, 2021 2:45 pm Very nice and handy, just keep those embers away from the gas tank ;)
Pretty sure that trailer doesn't have a gas tank...but I've been wrong before...
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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mattpeneguy wrote: Tue May 11, 2021 3:04 pm Pretty sure that trailer doesn't have a gas tank...but I've been wrong before...
My bad, I didn't look closely enough. Thought it was a pickup / flatbed. <()>
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take - Wayne Gretzky
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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mattpeneguy wrote: Wed May 12, 2021 1:19 pmimage.png
I find it funny that he still gave it two stars. I would have only given it one star if I was murdered there.
Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.
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VicFrauenfeld wrote: Wed May 12, 2021 1:54 pm I find it funny that he still gave it two stars. I would have only given it one star if I was murdered there.
I have no idea if this movie will be good, but go watch the entire trailer over at:

Then scroll down and read the very first comment (don't cheat and read it first, if you do it won't be near as funny)...If you found what I posted above funny, you'll find that post hilarious. I almost spit coffee on my monitor...
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Roasted By John wrote: Wed May 12, 2021 3:59 pm image.png
Many years ago I was going down the road out in the country (yes, it was in Texas) and saw an unusual vehicle parked near a house. It was a great big 4-wheel drive chassis . . . with an bright red Corvette body.
"On the days when I keep my gratitude higher than my expectations, well, I have really good days."

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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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VicFrauenfeld wrote: Wed May 12, 2021 1:54 pm I find it funny that he still gave it two stars. I would have only given it one star if I was murdered there.
He probably enjoyed the show up until........
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Sooo...they lifted the mask mandate for vaccinated people, but I didn't see guidance on public waterfountains...Is it okay to go back to drinking from them like this?

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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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mattpeneguy wrote: Wed May 12, 2021 1:58 pm I have no idea if this movie will be good, but go watch the entire trailer over at:

Then scroll down and read the very first comment (don't cheat and read it first, if you do it won't be near as funny)...If you found what I posted above funny, you'll find that post hilarious. I almost spit coffee on my monitor...
..too many tatter tots UU
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Because they can!
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Don't worry Dassault, your platform may be ready by the time everything switches back to all caps...So no need to change a thing...
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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DennisD wrote: Sun May 16, 2021 2:26 pm Because they can!
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The sad thing is, even Tesla owners vote.
Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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He that finds his life will lose it, and he who loses his life for [Christ's] sake will find it. Matt. 10:39
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
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Re: Jokes Thread (Keep it Clean)

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Brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls aren't there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to show us how badly we want things.
- - -Randy Pausch
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